Ahh, Mother’s Day. A day to show our mothers how much we appreciate them (and dare we not do it!) by killing flowers, pulpifying trees, and gorging on sweets by way of the plantation. Now that’s love…

Okay, we jest and it’s not that we all aren’t deserving of a little luxury now and then. But sometimes it seems that Mother’s Day is about trying to shop our way out of responsibility, something we modern day capitalists have elevated to an artform. And as usual, we’re cheered on by the corporations who have taken what began as a day for women’s activism and transformed it into a multi-billion dollar cash cow for industry. Few people know that the roots of Mother’s Day lie in women working together for a better world.

Unless you’re on an activist listserv. In which case, you are using the day to promote various worthy, even heart-wrenching causes. From Code Pink to Action LA, Mother’s Day is da day. Okay, we’re raising money for a good cause too—but we’d like to take you on a trip down Herstory lane to find out what Mother’s Day started out as, and just where it went so terribly wrong.

First some figures:

This Mother’s Day is estimated to be a $15.8 billion industry in the U.S. alone, and that’s slightly down from last year, no doubt a reflection of current economic uncertainty. Interestingly, though consumers are tightening up, jewelry has shot up to $2.7 billion from $2.1 billion. Guess gold’s a safe bet even for mother these days.

Estimated Mother’s Day Spending 2008:

Dinner/Brunch – $3 B
Jewelry – $2.7 B
Electronics – $1.2 B
Flowers – $2 B
Clothing & Accessories – $1.4 B
Spa, Salon & Personal Services – $1.1 B
Gift Cards/Certificates – $1.6 B
Home & Garden – $696 M
Greeting Cards – $672 M

Source: National Retail Federation

As the industry publication Florists’ Review once put it, “this was a holiday that could be exploited.” No wonder people think Mother’s Day was invented by Hallmark! When Inter Pares, a Canadian women’s aid and development organization asked us to collaborate on their Mother’s Day fundraising campaign, we had some vague notion that it was once connected to peacemaking. But the more we delved it, the more we realized its rich origins are marked by the work of three amazing women who all had different motivations, but a common vigour in pursuit of their visions. What began as a simple e-tribute card concept morphed into “A Feminist Heritage Minute” (actually closer to two), our somewhat Python-esque rendition of a historical montage about the three founding mothers of the day.

The First Mother of Mother’s Day

The inspiration for a national Mother’s Day came from a West Virginian woman and mother of eleven who suffered through the loss of eight of her children. In 1858 at only twenty-six, Ann Marie Reeves Jarvis organized women in her area into Mothers Day Work Clubs to improve the health and sanitation conditions in her county. During the American Civil War, she was adamant her clubs stay neutral and they courageously nursed soldiers from both sides. When the war ended, she arranged the first Mothers Friendship Day in 1868, an event to reconcile friends and families torn apart by the bitter conflict, and they were celebrated on several occasions after.

Mother’s Day for Peace (1870)

Influenced by Ann Jarvis and reeling from the carnage left over from the American Civil War, the prominent Boston writer, abolitionist, and suffragist Julia Ward Howe issued a Mothers’ Day Proclamation in 1870, calling on women around the world to unite to end war. She saw mothers as being uniquely invested in stopping the killing of each others sons, and worked to have a Mothers’ Day for Peace recognized on June 2. Though it never really caught on, in recent years, the peace movement has reclaimed Mother’s Day and Howe’s work in actions to end the Iraq War.

When Ann Marie Reeves Jarvis passed away, her daughter Anna vowed to realize her mother’s dream of a day commemorating mothers and the “matchless service rendered to humanity.” On the second Sunday of May 1908, the third anniversary of her mother’s death, 15,000 people showed up at a Philadelphia church to celebrate a general memorial day for all mothers. Anna also began the custom a wearing a carnation on Mother’s Day, her mother’s favorite flower, as a pure and inexpensive symbol of love and respect.

By 1909, Canada, Mexico, and 45 U.S. States were celebrating Mothers Day. In 1914, it was declared a U.S. national holiday. But thanks to tinkering by officials, the apostrophe was moved and it became “Mother’s Day,” a day to celebrate the individual mother and her work in the home, thus changing the collective nature and meaning of every Mothers Day that had come before.

Anna ‘Rebel’ Jarvis

In many ways, the story of Mother’s Day is the story of Anna Jarvis. She is the embodiment of the dutiful daughter and consummate activist, dedicating her life to pay tribute to her own mother. But her fierce nature really comes through when she began her unsuccessful lifelong fight against its commercialization. When carnation prices rose she attacked florists as pirates and racketeers whose greed was undermining the noble spirit of the day. In the 1930s, she was arrested protesting a meeting of the American War Mothers who were selling carnations to raise money. She even incorporated Mother’s Day and threatened to sue anyone who infringed on the patent. Anna Jarvis would spend the rest of her life and her fortune bitterly trying to take back the day. And though she was never a mother herself, she is considered to be the mother of Mother’s Day.

Katherine Dodds AKA “Kat” is the founder of Good Company Communications and HelloCoolWorld.com. Sandy Haksi is an editor and contributing writer for HelloCoolWorld.